Abbey of the Arts

Transformative Living through Contemplative & Expressive Arts

  • Welcome
    • Prayer Cycle
      • Day 1 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Cathedral
      • Day 2 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Scriptures
      • Day 3 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Saints
      • Day 4 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Spiritual Directors
      • Day 5 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Icon
      • Day 6 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Sacrament
      • Day 7 Morning & Evening Prayer:
        Earth as the Original Liturgy
      • Prayer Cycle Leader Resources
    • About the Abbey
    • About Christine Valters Paintner
    • About John Valters Paintner
    • About the Wisdom Council
    • Monk Manifesto
    • Join the Holy Disorder of Dancing Monks
    • Subscribe to Our Love Notes
    • Website privacy notice
  • Books
    • Sacred Time:
      Embracing an Intentional Way of Life
    • The Wisdom of Wild Grace: Poems
    • Earth, Our Original Monastery:
      Cultivating Wonder and Gratitude through Intimacy with Nature
    • Dreaming of Stones: Poems
    • The Soul's Slow Ripening:
      12 Celtic Practices for Seeking the Sacred
    • The Wisdom of the Body:
      A Contemplative Journey to Wholeness for Women
    • Illuminating the Way:
      Embracing the Wisdom of Monks and Mystics
    • The Soul of a Pilgrim:
      Eight Practices for the Journey Within
    • Eyes of the Heart:
      Photography as a Christian Contemplative Practice
    • The Artist's Rule: Nurturing Your Creative Soul with Monastic Wisdom
    • Desert Mothers and Fathers: Early Christian Wisdom Sayings Annotated & Explained
    • Lectio Divina–The Sacred Art: Transforming Words and Images into Heart-Centered Prayer
    • Water, Wind, Earth & Fire: The Christian Practice of Praying with the Elements
    • Awakening the Creative Spirit:
      Bringing the Arts to Spiritual Direction
    • Lectio Divina: Contemplative Awakening & Awareness
  • Poetry | Art | Music
    • Music + DVD
    • Poetry by Christine Valters Paintner
    • Poetry Videos
    • Dancing Monk Icons
    • Other Art Collaborations
      • Monk in the World art series by Kristin Noelle
      • Saints & Animals art series by David Hollington
      • Sacred Time art series by Alexi Francis
      • Mary block print art series by Kreg Yingst
  • Programs
    • Walk the Ancient Paths: Pilgrimage
      • Monk in the World (Ireland)
      • Writing on the Wild Edges (Ireland)
      • Poetry and the Sacred Garden of the World (Ireland)
      • Vienna Monk in the World (Austria)
      • Hildegard of Bingen (Germany)
    • Live Programs and Spiritual Retreats
      • Awakening the Creative Spirit: Experiential Education for Spiritual Directors in the Expressive Arts (Northwest)
    • Community Online Retreats
      • Lift Every Voice: Contemplative Writers of Color
      • The Way of the Hermit:
        A Spiritual Survival Guide for Dark Times
        with Kayleen Asbo, PhD
      • The Spiral Way:
        Celtic Spirituality and the Creative Imagination
      • Journey with the Desert Mothers and Fathers (Lent 2021)
      • Sacred Time: Embracing an Intentional Way of Life (Spring 2021)
    • Self-Study Online Spiritual Retreats
      • Creative Flourishing in the Heart of the Desert:
        An Online Retreat with St. Hildegard of Bingen
      • Dreaming of the Sea:
        A women’s discernment journey through the story of the Selkie
      • Earth, Our Original Monastery
        A Companion Retreat to the Book (SELF-STUDY)
      • Exile and Coming Home:
        An Archetypal Journey through the Scriptures
      • Eyes of the Heart:
        Photography as Contemplative Practice
        (Companion retreat to the book)
      • Honoring Saints and Ancestors:
        Online Retreat for the Season of Remembrance
      • Lectio Divina:
        The Sacred Art of Reading the World
      • A Midwinter God:
        Making a Conscious Underworld Journey
      • Sacred Rhythms of Sky, Sun, Sea & Stone:
        A Creative Retreat with the Elements (SELF-STUDY)
      • Sacred Seasons:
        A Yearlong Journey through the Celtic Wheel of the Year
      • The Soul of a Pilgrim:
        Eight Practices for the Journey Within
        (a companion retreat to the book)
      • The Soul's Slow Ripening: 12 Celtic Practices for Seekers of the Sacred (a companion retreat to the book)
      • Water, Wind, Earth & Fire
      • Watershed Moments
        in the Hebrew and Christian Scriptures
      • Way of the Monk, Path of the Artist:
        A 12-Week Companion Retreat to The Artist's Rule
      • The Wisdom of the Body:
        A 10-Week Online Companion Retreat to the Book
      • The Wisdom of Mary and the Sacred Feminine
  • Calendar
  • Reflections
  • Contact

Monk in the World Guest Post Series

Monk in the World Guest Post: Nancy Agneberg

I am delighted to share another beautiful submission to our Monk in the World guest post series from the community. Read on for Nancy Agneberg's reflection, Surprise, Nancy, You are Retired!

“So what do you do?”

My husband Bruce and I were spending a long weekend in one of our favorite vacation areas, Door County, WI. Often called the “New England of the Midwest,” Door County is a long, narrow peninsula with Green Bay on one side and Lake Michigan on the other. We loved roaming the countryside, as well as enjoying the water views. Restaurants, galleries, theatre. Time there was restorative.

One morning we stopped in a gallery where the artist-owner engaged Bruce in conversation, asking if this was our first visit to Door County and where we were staying. The usual. And then he asked the “What do you do?” question.

“I'm a hospice doc in Madison.”

“Wow, what an admirable thing,” he responded. I circled the gallery, hoping to avoid being asked the same “What do you do?” question, for I was not yet comfortable saying, “Oh, I'm one of the lucky ones. I'm retired.”

We had moved from Ohio to Madison, WI, recently, and I struggled to find my next step. I had reached out, sent out resumes, networked, made calls, followed leads, explored options, took classes. I gave it my best shot, but nothing seemed to click. At age 60, it seems, I had retired, much to my surprise.

Our Ohio home, Sweetwater Farm, had been a place of shelter and sanctuary where people felt privileged to spend time. Visiting us became an event, a ritual, a retreat. Our life there with the gardens and pond, the century home filled with antiques, the barn housing our personal petting zoo—llamas and sheep and geese and goats, donkey and chickens, oh my—was what many people say they, too, want. We lived the fantasy for many.

I completed my training as a spiritual director and met with clients there. I prepared classes and retreats, even leading some at the farm, and I enjoyed quiet writing time. I lived a contemplative life.

The first year in Madison, while waiting for the farm to sell, we lived in an unappealing apartment. Each time I walked up the dreary stairs and down a colorless hallway to a nameless door, I felt anonymous. I missed our cheery laundry room where quarters were not required. I resented the teeny-tiny mailbox that chewed up the home décor magazines I loved. When I sat on our small balcony for morning meditation, I missed the uninterrupted quiet I achieved without effort at the farm and instead, became privy to conversations I did not want to hear.

When I expressed to a friend how clueless I had been, she showed her surprise.

“Do you mean to tell me you didn't spend any time writing in your journal about what this move might mean for you? You are usually so reflective, seeing beneath the surface of situations.”

“I know and, of course, I filled page after page about this move and our new life here, but I truly thought I would be welcomed and recognized for what I could bring to the community.”

“Well, friend, I guess it is time to pull out your journal and go a bit deeper.”

Of course.

My inner voice, the one beneath morning traffic and slamming doors and crying children, invited me to clear the space, to find open space, to rest in the expanse in front of me, behind me. My sanctuary became the car, and I wandered country roads. I headed to where I could see beyond the rainbow. I looked for the first hints of fall or a hawk over the horizon. I took a deep breath and became the lone tree across the meadow with grass at my toes to keep me grounded and branches to touch the blues no one else sees.

Sometimes I went to the University of Wisconsin's student union on the shore of Lake Mendota where the water view welcomed me. “Come, sit as long as you want.” The expanse of water and sky momentarily set aside the yearning, the urgency to know, “what's next?” as I imagined myself floating into that expanse where waterline touches skyline, where body, mind and spirit unite, where what is far away is also close at hand.

These moments of reflection, of contemplation, helped ease me into acceptance, into the surprise of being retired.

I needed time to dry on the clothesline. Some slow sipping time. Some take a breath into midair time. Some time to hit the pause button. Time to cleanse the palate. Unsubscribe. Wade in the water. I needed time to honor the transition. Time to sit with the Divine, the Sacred, and enjoy the surprise. 


Nancy L. Agneberg, a writer and spiritual director, finds joy helping others deepen their relationship to the Divine, the Sacred, the Holy, especially as one ages. Currently, Nancy is writing a spiritual memoir about the spiritual invitations of moving and living in different homes. She posts frequently on her blog, Clearing the Space.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Pinterest
  • Print
«
»

6 Comments January 31, 2018

Upcoming Programs

The Way of the Hermit:
A Spiritual Survival Guide for Dark Times

January 22-24, 2021
with Kayleen Asbo, PhD

The Spiral Way:
Celtic Spirituality and the Creative Imagination

Hosted by the Rowe Center
February 1-21, 2021
with Christine Valters Paintner, PhD

Recent Reflections

  • Humility + Join us today for live prayer! ~ A Love Note from Your Online Abbess
  • Hildy Tales 2: Tús maith leath na hoibre – by John Valters Paintner
  • New Book Club for 2021: Lift Every Voice ~ A Love Note from Your Online Abbess
  • Hildy Tales One: Dia dhuit, is mise Hildy! by John Valters Paintner, Your Online Prior
  • Celebrate the Earth Monastery Prayer Cycle podcast with us!

Connect with the Abbey

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
JOIN THE HOLY DISORDER OF DANCING MONKS
SIGN UP FOR UPDATES
DONATE TO SUPPORT OUR MINISTRY

Copyright © 2021 BY ABBEY OF THE ARTS · WEBSITE PRIVACY NOTICE

Copyright © 2021 · Flourish Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in