Give Me a Word: An Ancient Practice to Guide Your Year

A key phrase, repeated often in The Sayings of the Desert Fathers, is “Give me a word.”   When a seeker went out to the wilderness to approach one of the ammas or abbas and said, “Give me a word,” they were not asking for a command or solution. They were opening their hearts to a communication which would slowly transform their lives.

We find this phrase repeated throughout the sayings of the desert fathers and mothers, those wise elders who, in the second and third centuries, went to the deserts of Egypt, Syria, and Palestine to cultivate a life of radical simplicity and ongoing devotion to the presence of the divine in their lives.

This tradition of asking for a word was a way of seeking something on which to ponder for many days, weeks, months, sometimes a whole lifetime.  The “word” was often a short phrase to nourish and challenge the receiver. A word was meant to be wrestled with and slowly grown into.

A monk once came to Basil of Caesarea and said, “Speak a word, Father”; and Basil replied, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart,” and the monk went away at once.  Twenty years later he came back and said, “Father, I have struggled to keep your word; now speak another word to me”; and he said, “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself”; and the monk returned in obedience to his cell to keep that also.

This story demonstrates how a word could be worked on for years at a time.  The word being sought was not a theological explanation or counseling.  It was part of a relationship which had developed and the assumption that this word, when received by the disciple, would be life-giving.  It was meant for this person in this moment of their lives.

Christine Valters Paintner has published a book about the process of receiving a word, and this retreat is a companion to it, providing additional guidance and support to contemplate what holiness is birthing within your soul. Each day there will be a different practice offered to inspire, challenge, and support you in listening for the word that wants to be spoken to your heart.

The practices are not about resolutions or goal setting, they are not about achieving more or accomplishing tasks or goals. They are about listening for what is calling to you in a particular season of life. They ask us to trust a greater wisdom at work in the world than our own egos.

Through this retreat, you will be invited to release your thinking mind and enter into a space of receiving.

Ask the wise presences in your life for your own life-giving word. You will be invited to listen in the stillness, to sacred texts, to your life, to dreams, to nature, to your body, to soul friends, to the ancestors.The word might come from reading a poem or story. It might come in a time of stillness, or it might arrive later in the day, wise words offered from an unexpected source, a dream symbol, a line from a conversation, or an image you stumble upon that seizes your imagination.

The word is something that shimmers for you, catching your attention in a particular way. Shimmering is a way to describe when something in the world is calling to you, beckoning you, urging you to pay closer attention. Sometimes what shimmers is challenging but we know that wrestling will yield something bigger in our lives. Sometimes what shimmers invokes wonder and awe. We notice a felt responses in our bodies and spirits that ask us to attune more deeply to what is being revealed.

The purpose of the word is to simply hold it in your heart, turning it over and over, pondering, but not analyzing.  Give it space within you to speak. We don’t force it into a meaning for us. We let it unfold slowly.

Once the word arrives, we offer you some ways to help confirm the word and break its meaning open further through creative explorations. And finally, we invite you to make some commitments for the season ahead rooted in your word.

We come to this process not from a sense of lack, but with hearts open to receiving the greater aliveness that is our birthright.

5 weeks allows a slow process of unfolding and receiving, not rushing through or grasping. You are invited to attune yourself to a different way of being in the world.

This retreat is a companion to Christine Valters Paintner’s book Give Me a Word. You will need to order a copy to have the text version of all the materials. This is in addition to the program fee.

You have lifetime access to all online programs.

Note: This program was originally offered as a live retreat for Advent, and there will be references to that sacred season. However, the materials are applicable any time of year. Please disregard any reference to sharing, as a discussion forum is not included in this self-study version.